A Spork in the Drawer

Your Republican Party

[Bumped: Two updates.]

George "Me, a Jew?" Allen staffers beat up critic.

(Video at link.)

I'm afraid it's only going to get worse over the next week.

[Via kos.]

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UPDATE: kos reminds us of what Allen's sister has to say:

"Ever since my brother George held me over the railing at Niagara Falls, I've had a fear of heights." [Fifth Quarter: The Scrimmage of a Football Coach's Daughter, page 43]

"We all obeyed George. If we didn't, we knew he would kill us. Once, when Bruce refused to go to bed, George hurled him through a sliding glass door. Another time, when Gregory refused to go to bed, George tackled him and broke his collarbone. Another time, when I refused to go to bed, George dragged me up the stairs by my hair." [Fifth Quarter: The Scrimmage of a Football Coach's Daughter, page 22]

And let's not forget Pennsylvania Republican Congressman Don "Mistress Strangler" Sherword. The Republicans are fun people. I guess "Abstinence for Adults" is a desperate attempt by Republicans to protect themselves from themselves.

UPDATE II: Video:

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Your Republican Party II

Dear, sweet, lovable Laura Bush:

Q: One of the issues that’s come up. Michael J. Fox. The whole issue of stem cell research. Your reaction to the events of the past week.

LAURA BUSH: Well, I don’t have any idea about any of those. I mean, I’ve watch on television just like you have. But the fact is President Bush is the only president that authorized funding for stem cell research. And, um, you know, it’s an issue that it’s easy to try to manipulate people’s feelings about and I understand that. My dad died of Alzheimer’s. You know, there’ s nothing I’d like more than to think there was a cure for Alzheimer’s. Especially before I get to be the age he is, but knowing also how he suffered. It’s always easy to manipulate people’s feelings, especially when you are talking about diseases that are so difficult. [Emphasis added.]

And she's the nice one.

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A Halloween Treat...

...from Maria.

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A Report From The Front

This past Sunday, reader nobozos decided to check attendance one of Li'l Ricky's campaign events.

Report follows.

Batshit Insane

That's the only way to explain Katie Harris:

Katherine Harris, who is trying to become a U.S. senator, says she is writing a tell-all about the many people who have wronged her. This includes, but is not necessarily limited to: the Republican leaders who didn't want her to run, the press that has covered her troubled campaign, and the many staffers who have quit her employ, whom she accuses of colluding with her opponent.

She is vague about what, precisely, makes her a victim, but she says she has it all documented.

"I've been writing it all year," she says in that kittenish voice. She often smiles and cocks her head as if she's letting you in on a secret. "It's going to be a great book."

[...]

The way Harris sees it, a vast left- and right-wing conspiracy, encompassing both the "liberal media" and the Republican "elite," is attempting to keep her out of the Senate. She says anyone could see the way the panel of questioners coddled Nelson at their debate last week. Her voice gets all high and mocking as she imitates them.

"Ooooh, Senator Nelson," she says. "I mean, come on."

It might be time to get a straight-jacket.

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FYI

When you vote for Democrats you're voting for terrorists:

"However they put it, the Democrat approach in Iraq comes down to this: The terrorists win and America loses," Bush told a raucous crowd of about 5,000 GOP partisans packed in an arena at Georgia Southern University in Statesboro, one of his stops Monday. "That's what's at stake in this election. The Democrat goal is to get out of Iraq. The Republican goal is to win in Iraq."

Smell the desperation.

Oh, and George? It's "Democrat-ic." Don't be juvenile.

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The Shredding Begins

Wonkette:

Spotted on 10/19, by an eagle-eyed Wonkette reader: The Mid-Atlantic Shredding Services truck making its way up to the Cheney compound at the Naval Observatory.

Fun fact: Mid-Atlantic Shredding Services has been contracted by the Secret Service for our Executive Branch’s record-not-keeping needs.

[Via C&L.]

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Why Elections Matter

They get away with it:

The Interior Department has dropped claims that the Chevron Corporation systematically underpaid the government for natural gas produced in the Gulf of Mexico, a decision that could allow energy companies to avoid paying hundreds of millions of dollars in royalties.

The agency had ordered Chevron to pay $6 million in additional royalties but could have sought tens of millions more had it prevailed. The decision also sets a precedent that could make it easier for oil and gas companies to lower the value of what they pump each year from federal property and thus their payments to the government.

It's good to have friends in high places.

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We'll All Be Children Soon

What BushCo™ thinks of you:

Now the government is targeting unmarried adults up to age 29 as part of its abstinence-only programs, which include millions of dollars in federal money that will be available to the states under revised federal grant guidelines for 2007.

The government says the change is a clarification. But critics say it's a clear signal of a more directed policy targeting the sexual behavior of adults.

"They've stepped over the line of common sense," said James Wagoner, president of Advocates for Youth, a Washington, D.C.-based non-profit that supports sex education. "To be preaching abstinence when 90% of people are having sex is in essence to lose touch with reality. It's an ideological campaign. It has nothing to do with public health."

The Right has long claimed that liberals are in favor of a "Nanny State," that adults can't be trusted to make decisions for themselves.

So much for that.

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Laying It On Thick

You know you're in trouble when yoou have to get Sean Hannity to campaign for you:

Santorum, of Pittsburgh, made his second stop in Lancaster County in four days when he stumped at the rally held on his behalf. Joining him on stage was radio and TV talk-show personality Sean Hannity, who told the voters they will be making a choice between good and evil on Election Day.

"There can only be one winner and one loser that day," said Hannity, co-host and producer of Fox News' "Hannity & Colmes."

Early Returns notes: "You'll notice that he didn't predict a winner."

Also campaining for Li'l Ricky was former Rep. Bob Walker, who said:

"A victory for Republicans will carry the message that our future is bright along the broadening way."

That's some quality purple prose; somebody get Walker a better speechwriter.

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